I can actually see my screen and keyboard, and my hands are not twitching, so I can finally blog again. So the month of June and part of July are going to be a break for me. I will not be on chemo or have any other treatments because the chemo treatment that I was supposed to have was gonna last too long and run into the bone marrow transplant, so they decided not to go forward with the chemo treatment. So that's great for me as I feel pretty good, although I still have some pain and fatigue.
We had something amusing happen last week. I was supposed to go in for a lumbar puncture, and we were waiting in the waiting room for quite some time when they finally came out to get me. It was different people than were used to seeing. The nurse was in blue scrubs, like she came from an operating room, and she began to ask me a whole bunch of questions that they never asked me before. Bear in mind, this is my 10th lumbar puncture, so we've been through this a lot, so this was very different. She took me through a different door than usual, and as we entered the area, we walked into a small operating room recovery area again, which was very strange. They then told me to undress from the top down, and I was lying in a hospital bed. When they do a lumbar puncture, I am lying on an X-ray table so that they can X-ray my back and find the proper spot for the needle to access my spinal column, so again, things were very strange. Finally, they informed me that they were preparing to put in my central line.
A central line (or central venous catheter) is like an intravenous (IV) line. But it is much longer than a regular IV and goes all the way up to a vein near the heart or just inside the heart. A patient can get medicine, fluids, blood, or nutrition through a central line. It can also be used to draw blood.
I told I told them I was very confused as I thought I was not scheduled for my central line until July 11th. I asked them who ordered the central line to be put in, and it was my BMT doctor, so I said if he ordered it I guess he wants it put in But it seems strange that he would want to put in five weeks before my bone marrow transplant Because I was not going to have any kind of chemo or anything like that until my transplant so there was no need for a central line. The doctor then came in and started talking to me about possible risks and so forth, and had him sign a consent. At this point, I felt like there was some kind of mix-up up so I really pressed them about the fact that I felt like this was not right. So they started making some phone calls and found out that, sure enough, there was some kind of scheduling faux pas. So they said, Go ahead and get dressed and head home. Though he found a lot of humor in it, it was still a bit of an emotional experience, as we were very confused and concerned about having a central line in for so long for no reason. But fortunately, we were able to get it worked out.
The next few weeks should be pretty relaxing, which I'm looking forward to a great deal. We have been through so much, and the bone marrow transplant is pretty intense, so I'm glad that I have time to prepare. Because part of the BMT, there a 100 days of recovery where much of it is in quarantine, so having some time with family and friends now is going to be very enjoyable. This will also give us more opportunity to prepare the house for when I get out of the hospital. Our house has to be like a hospital room in that we have to sanitize everything, get the carpets cleaned, ducts cleaned, and much more. We are so grateful for all the donations that everyone has made because they have helped cover those costs and purchase some things that will help keep us sane during Quarantine. I also want to thank you all for your prayers, love, and support; without them, it would make this journey much more difficult.
As we progress through this journey, I pray that our Savior will be pleased with my faith and deep desire to please him. I love the talk by Elder Neil L. Andersen of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, Faith Is Not by Chance, but by Choice. A quote from that talk makes me really contemplate my faith and what I need to do to strengthen it.
"The Savior perceived the strength or weakness in the faith of those around Him. To one, He said approvingly, “Great is thy faith.” He lamented to another, “O ye of little faith.” He questioned others, “Where is your faith?” And Jesus distinguished yet another with, “[In all Israel] I have not found so great faith.”
I ask myself, “How does the Savior see my faith?” And tonight I ask you, “How does the Savior see your faith?”
Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ is not something ethereal, floating loosely in the air. Faith does not fall upon us by chance or stay with us by birthright. It is, as the scriptures say, “substance … , the evidence of things not seen.” Faith emits a spiritual light, and that light is discernible. Faith in Jesus Christ is a gift from heaven that comes as we choose to believe and as we seek it and hold on to it. Your faith is either growing stronger or becoming weaker. Faith is a principle of power, important not only in this life but also in our progression beyond the veil. By the grace of Christ, we will one day be saved through faith on His name. The future of your faith is not by chance, but by choice."
I pray that I may make choices that will strengthen my faith and bring me closer to my Savior.
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